Two Options

by Melissa Kummerow

Two Options

Love or fear.

Every decision – love or fear.

Every belief – based in love or fear.

Every reaction – Love? or Fear?

Fear my humor be faced with stoned-face statues.

Fear my intelligence be swatted away.

Maybe I’m more moth-eaten than I’d thought.

Kindness embraced by malevolence.

My laughter mocked by angels, rajas, or the Joker himself.

Trust be smitten by narcissistic bite.

Fear of being less important than I expected I would be.

Or worse, more important.

Fear my helpfulness becomes the hindrance.

Or worse, that I’m wanted more than I can stand.

Fear my friendship be ignored.

Fear the bridges from my dragon days will never be rebuilt. 

Passion derided as childish anger, or maybe insecurity.

My love thought as clingy.

We have much in common, Eve, we’ve empathized with a snake.

That good old fashioned fear of missing out – what is on that other side….

Had you chosen love instead –

to decide to trust your Creator’s love for you, to trust His directives are Good

rather than dismiss, doubt, and divide yourself from them…

I wouldn’t be here writing this.

I understand you well.

But then the whispers shift – did they shift for you?

Somehow I am learning how to love what I fear,

an excuse to play my shadows

to bask in sweet lip smoke.

And so goes Fibonacci all over again,

it’s elementary spiritual math:

the cycle is more malevolent each time around,

a sensuous abyss of hand-picked lies…

with always the clearer, the scarier, the more urgent Truth

on its counterpart side.

  Two options as I long into the deep ratio:

Fear or love.